Sound Off [14]

"You have enemies? Good, that means you've stood up for something."

I can say the various times I've stood up for myself, and either faced my opponent strongly to avoid another confrontation, or faced my opponent and the situation grew worse. Sometimes, you really can't do anything about the situation and you need to let it simmer out with the times.

Once an enemy was created, and I tried to form a friendship, at least one where we could cordially meet one another and exchange the time. Did not quite work out the way I had planned. I did try, and it was amusing to see her avoid confrontation with me, I was more saddened that she could not hear me say to her face how much of a person I thought she was, and will turn into. Someday she'll see what I thought of her. All very nice things mind you, but sometimes you have to let them simmer and wait for the outcome later on.

Another time, I was confronted with another girl whom never truly appreciated what others did and looked at herself as being perfect. I made it clear that I did not like her remarks, and she could keep them to herself. However the bullying continued, and I counted down the days for the school year to end. When she was gone, I breathed easier, even though there were bigger fish to fry, well, I was the smaller fish to fry but still. I had tried, and made an enemy out of someone that really wasn't worth the time.

Have I tried standing up for myself? Yes. Has it gotten me anywhere? Yes. Moving on from girl bullies, lets look at boy bullies. Again, have I tried standing up for myself? Yes. Has it gotten me anywhere? Yes. Have those boys even looked at me again? Only a few, and I am grateful for those few. The others, if you think about it, they weren't worth it if they couldn't respect me. I'm grateful for the men that respect my answers and allow me to be me, and I do not have respect for the boys who do not respect women.

This is considering relationships, looking into the work place, I have created a few unwanted enemies. For instance, I hit a co-workers car. Completely by accident. Paid the bill, and both of us when on our way. Sort of, trying to get my old job back as you read this. However, I faced the bill and he has more respect for me seeing how I accepted the payment. When I stood up for myself in another work environment, it didn't go as well, I was told to go home without the chance to explain myself. I waited until I had the moment to do so and after that I didn't make any enemies, but I didn't make any more friends. It's work though, and in the environment that I was in at the time, there were no 'friendships', there were work-relationships, but the way that the corporation was going, there was no time to begin or improve work relationships. The job left me and it has turned into another learned experience.

I hope you can understand that you can stand up for yourself, and you can be the better person when you do. You may make enemies, but when you do, you also create friends who may not make themselves visible, but they are there all the same. I have friends, I have enemies, I have some people who would give me the time but that is all they would offer. I've stood up for myself, and found myself in a more difficult situation than anticipated, but I've learned. Have you found yourself in one of these situations? How have you solved the problem? I hope you are in a better place for showing that you can stand up for yourself, no matter the situation.